Reasons not to Drink

This is Eli in his new summer outfit w/ matching hat. The kid has the longest legs! I can't believe he's already 4 1/2 months. I had to adjust the straps on his car seat again yesterday. He is the number one reason I shouldn't drink. The others are listed below.

2. I only like fatty alcohol that will not help w/ losing the pregnancy weight at all.

3. I get silly and say/do stupid things.

4. Jason will certainly not be getting up with Eli in the morning and I will be exhausted and vaguely hungover while trying to care for my infant and unsure if my breast milk is going to make him drunk if I don't pump and dump.



Sunday morning (Father's Day) was so hellish! And Sunday evening we got the worst service ever from the Wendy's on Centre Ave. By the time we got home I was having a crankathon and snapping at Jason over every little thing. I tried to be super nice yesterday to make up for it, even though I'm pretty sure he'd forgotten. He gets over things pretty quick. Unlike me, I'll hold a grudge for-ever.

On a happy note Eli has been sleeping a lot better since I stopped swaddling him and moved him from the bassinet to the bottom part of the pack'n'play. Apparently he likes a hard surface and the freedom to roll.

Take your passion and make it happen

What's cuter than a baby in legwarmers? Nothing. Thanks to Heather (the maker of Eli's superbaby ensemble) I am now obsessed with babylegs. I got two pairs yesterday and Eli and I had a lovely fashion show:

Also Jen came over for our walk, and we opened up my mom's closed restaurant to fetch some soda's since the beverage selection at my apt. was sorely lacking. I was just waiting for someone to poke thier head in and ask for a sandwich. Then I watched the last 45 mins. of the Big Love season premiere after putting Eli to bed. The first 15 mins. were silent, which I'm blaming the Soprano's bulls#@$ I think my cables broken ending. It was kinda hard to enjoy the show with Eli upstairs and me downstairs, because I'm always sure he's going to stop breathing while I'm in the other room. He'll suffocate and I'll never live down the guilt of him dying while i watch some stupid t.v. show that I don't get on the upstairs set. Of course he was fine, sleeping like an angel when I went up to bed myself. Mommy is just paranoid.

Resolution #1

I think I'm going to start trying to look just a little hotter and more alluring while out walking around the city. The purpose of this being that I would really like someone to post a missed connection about me on craigslist. I'm not saying that I would do anything about it...but you know it'd be nice to be noticed. Besides I did pay good money for the makeup collecting dust in my bathroom...

Last night at around 3:30 am Eli woke up to eat. So I changed his diaper, and let him nurse until he unlatched. He was all kinds of sleepy as I laid him back down, but the second I tried to step away it was all wide-awake baby. I indulged him by walking him and playing with him for a little while, until about 4:30, an hour and a half before my alarm would be going off. Then I put on my best stern face, and I looked down at him and said "time to go back to bed Bubba, it's nighttime, nighttime is for sleeping. Time to go back to sleep now." And he full-on belly laughed at me. Adorable little smart-ass.

SuperBaby

Here is a picture of Eli in his fabulous new diaper.

It was a present from a friend of a friend and a lovely surprise. He's also sporting some baby legs she made him which are, as the picture implies, just like leg warmers only for babies. What you can't see in this picture is that Eli is crying, mommy has a bad habit of trying to finish taking the picture or just thinking that the crying is cute too and should be recorded on camera. I keep having visions of him looking at pics when he is older and demanding to know why I didn't pick him up and comfort him. I imagine that he will then take these pics to his therapist who will declare them to be the root of everything that is wrong with him.




And this is Eli this morning before I went to work, I think he kinda looks like a little pimp. I like that.

Last night the little man and I took the stroller to Sure-Save to pick up mommies dinner (potato, broccoli, and cheddar pierogies), had playtime on the floor, and took a bubble bath. Eli is getting much better about playing by himself while I eat, thank God. He likes to take his toys and figure out which end fits in his mouth better, and roll/inch worm his way off the blanket onto the nubby carpet that i know is going to give him some sort of nasty rash. We both enjoy bath time. Last night we sang along to Jeff Buckley and he peed in his towel as soon as I put him on it. Good times.

One Year Ago...

As I was filling out the paperwork for my Aflac supplemental insurance I realized that today marks a very fun personal anniversary for me. One year ago today I found out I was pregnant. J and I hadn't been trying for very long (only a month), but I was sick to my stomach, tired, cranky, my boobs were swollen, and my period was about 5 days late. At the drugstore I was so nervous, not wanting to get my hopes up, feeling furtive with my purchase. J had gone golfing and I peed on the stick all by myself. The digital readout said pregnant almost immeadiately and I just started laughing and crying. It was all my dreams come true. And now Eli is all my dreams come true. 9 months of planning and 4 months of catering to my little tyrants every need and I am head over heels


When I look at his feet sometimes I am amazed that I made those feet!

And to think that his face is a perfect mix of J and myself blows me away. In my heart I have been a mommy for 1 whole year. Happy anniversary to me.

4 months!

Eli turned 4 months old on Saturday. I can hardly believe it's been 4 months, but at the same time I can hardly remember what life was like without him. Sleeping late, spending $300.00 in one trip to Victoria's secret, and fitting into my size 8 jeans are all distant memories. But when he sees me enter a room and his whole face lights up, or when he's sleepy and snuggling into my shoulder it's all worth it. He had his 4 month check up yesterday and weighed in at 13 lbs. even, which means he hasn't doubled his birth weight of 7lbs 9 oz. That was worrying me a little, but as several people pointed out to me all babies are different, and there is a childhood obesity epidemic in this country that I'd be happy for him to avoid. The doctor wants me to start him on cereal mixed with breast milk twice a day, but I just don't think that's necessary yet, he's still so little. So, I just kind of nodded my head but didn't agree to anything, and hopefully J doesn't just do it while I'm not there. He thinks that anything the doctor says is gospel. Today is rainy and nasty and I'm looking forward to going home and being lazy with the little one. Hopefully he'll sleep tonight. My little sleep terrorist. I got 4 1/2 hours last night, but I'm blaming the restlessness on his immunizations, five vaccines is a lot! If he doesn't start sleeping better soon I'm going to read aloud to him from baby books
"4 month old babies need 15 hrs. of sleep a day.", "At 4 months babies often begin sleeping through the night."
Maybe he just doesn't realize what's expected of him, I'm sure he wants to keep up with his peers and hit his milestones. Speaking of milestones he's been rolling like a champ, he even did it for the nurse at his check up yesterday. Mommy is very proud, I'm sure this is more evidence that he's a genius. And last night when we were walking in the park he made friends with a very cute 6 month old baby girl. He's such a flirt already. It's amazing how they start off as these blank canvases and everyday they become more and more themselves.

Poor Mr. B.

My puppy, Mr. Belvedere, who is two years old, was diagnosed with stage five lymphatic cancer in November. The doctors gave him two months to live and he's been doing really well, and I was starting to think that maybe he beat the odds. Unfortunately the past couple of days he's been really sick, and yeterday he refused to eat; even when offered hotdogs off the grill. So, I'm taking him into the vet tonight and we'll probably end up having him put down. I'm so sad. He was my first baby boy and I love him. He always sleeps not just in my bed, but under the covers. And when he sits he always has to be on someones lap, or on your feet. He loves to be cuddled. I don't know if I'll ever love another dog as much. I hope they have big fluffy beds, large grassy fields, and lots of squeaky toys in doggy heaven.

So, this weekend my in-laws came to visit. And you know how people make mother in-law jokes and its pretty cliche, I now know why its the cliche. Actually for me though it was more my father in-law who knows everything about everything and has no problem telling you what to do. Here's a short list.

1. Things I do wrong with my child:

a. I don't medicate him to make him stop crying.

b. I don't do a good enough job cutting his nails

c. I hold him too much, if I keep holding him as much as I do now he will never be independent. He'll be wanting me to carry him piggyback at his College graduation.

d. I put him in the cart in his car seat at the grocery store, this is patently unsafe, and I obviously have a death wish for him.

e. I let him cry at wal-mart and didn't get him out of his seat because we were in the checkout line. Then, when I turned my back for 30 secs, he got Eli out. When i went to put my son back in I was informed he would cry, I said "I know, because you got him out of his seat." and the FIL said "wait til we get to the car to put him back in." fed up I replied "I'm putting him in now."

his response was "Make your baby cry, go ahead make him cry" so, I very maturely replied, "I made him, I pushed him out, I'll do whatever I want with him!" and then I glared and stomped off. I know I should have maintained my cool, but it was 3 days in and my nerves were frayed.

2. Things that are wrong with my apartment:

a. We don't have rubber stripping around our front door and you can smell the food that the neighbor cooks.

b. Our mini-blinds let in to much heat, FIL solved this by nailing blankets over the windows.

c. The furniture in the living room was not set up to his liking, so, when I went upstairs to put the baby to bed he rearranged it. And then told me how much better it looked.

3. General wrongness in the city and my life:

a. Jason and I must immediately buy a house and acquire a 30 year loan, it's silly to rent and we musn't be afraid of debt.

b. Every light in Pittsburgh should be right turn on red, the fact that they aren't is just stupidity on the city planners part.

c. He could never live in Pittsburgh because he "needs to live near water, you know I need an ocean, or a RIVER or something." Um, hello, we have 3 rivers. 3, we are currently driving across one!

And then there is the fact that they insist on speaking Spanish 75% of the time despite my constant reminders that I do not, in fact, speak Spanish.

So there's my rant. I'm sure I'll feel much better after a good night's sleep. Eli is teething and not sleeping well, and spending a lot of time yelling when he is awake. Poor baby, I know it hurts him. It's just frustrating for everyone.

The man is my FIL, the woman with J is his mom. And the adorable baby in the pirates outfit is obviously Eli, almost 4 months old already!

So, I was reading some other people's blogs, and I decided it would be nice to have one that was baby-oriented. I clicked on the create blog link and put in my info and it took me here. After I got done laughing at myself I decided to go ahead with the blog thing.

A few things have changed since that last post, I decided that Mr. Miami was a viable option, moved in with him, got pregnant by him and high tailed it back to Pittsburgh. Reading that last post it doesn't even feel like i know that girl, two years can make quite a difference in a girls life. Less than a year after that I was struck by baby fever. All i could think about was pro-creating. Here are the results of all that wishing and hoping and planning and dreaming:

Elijah Daniel now almost 4 months old and the center of my universe. Even if he is a bit of a sleep terrorist lately.

he's just mad cause he cant hit it

so last night at work i had to cut off my friend katie. katie is 5' nothing and weighs 90 pounds, but she can drink everyone i know under the table. so my pit bosses problem wasnt that she was too drunk, cause bitch could have drunk a lot more, my pit bosses problem was that she was drinking with a dealer who wast her husband. he said it didnt look right. i told him that being the moral police when you work in a casino is pretty much a moot point. he didnt like my insolence. one of these nights im going to mouth off to the wrong person. luckily the gm adores me. and why shouldnt he, im awesome. katie and tracy and i are going to drink there thursday night. i think were going to get asked to leave. but thats a chance im willing to take. i really didnt have enough fun when i was younger, i was too busy being the good kid. so now im going to have fun. whenever the opportunity presents itself. even if its like the night i got entirely too drunk and ended up throwing up behind the 7 11. embarrassing yes. miserable in the morning because i was still in the restaurant and had to serve people eggs. but worth it.
my best friend and roommate is 8 months pregnant and im getting more excited by the day. i look at pictures of newborns and almost start crying. i want one of my own half the time, and then i realize how much better its going to be just to hang out with hers. its not like im dating anyone viable. or like you could call what im doing with phil dating at all. and the other prospect is a bi polar ass. one second were down and hes all playful and up on me. the next hes ignoring me. its like high school. and while i didnt have a lot of relationships in that era im still too old for that bullshit right now. so im being high school right back and ignoring his ass. kind of like ignore him before he ignores me. and he has a gut. and weird sideburns like hes trying to imitate aj from the backstreet boys. he's from miami so maybe he is. or maybe hes just got dissociative identity disorder and not all of his personalities recognize my inherent hotness. even when im shaking my pantyhose clad ass in his face. thats the theory i like best. the one that sounds the most soap opera.

welcome to emily

So. this is me. i live in las vegas, im 23, im a cocktail waitress. all of this is not as glamorous as it sounds. vegas, when you live here is just like any other city. only less safe, more roaches, and there are slot machines in the bathrooms at gas stations. there are slot machines everywhere. anyone who's ever flown in has seen the mini screened in casinos by the gates. and people actually gamble there. losing their money before they can even get checked into their hotels. and i dont cocktail somewhere on the strip. i dont even work at one of the big local casinos that line the main roads here. i work at a tiny little locals casino that attracts mostly old people and rednecks. the thing is that its perfect for my training. and i like that the other cocktail waitresses are older. one of them sweats profusely and wears a knee brace. the head cocktail waitress is about 40 and wears her hair in the 80's style helmet and dyes it a flaming red never found in nature. it is a color that shouldnt be found in nature. compared to the others im pretty hot. i work the graveyard shift cause im low gal on the totem pole. graveyard is 1 am to 9 am by 6 am theres pretty much no one in the place. so i talk to my bartenders and stand there with my shoes off. im tall and have always been in the habit of wearing flats, otherwise i tower over any guys that might come a callin', and the heels kill my feet.
i like vegas though. which is good because i moved here from pittsburgh pretty much on a whim.