I'm Looking Forward

To not having to wear these boots anymore. I want to be able to wear my flats without getting my feet soaked and frozen. There's a few more months yet before that will happen and it's starting to wear on me.



Eli and I have been having a lot more inside time than what we'd gotten used to, luckily this change has coincided with his attention span getting a lot longer. Eli's a movie fan.

Here he's watching Aladdin and clearly something very serious is taking place on screen. The Land Before Time continues to be his very favorite movie; he's started making dinosaur noises and the other day I caught him making the same faces as Sara the tricerotops. Since Eli's so attentive now I've decided it's time for him to see his first movie in the theater! I'll be taking him to see Coraline http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LO3n67BQvh0 don't worry, Eli does not scare easily.

The young sir is also enjoying this weather a lot more than any of the grown ups in his life.

The Christmas sled is a hit. I exhausted myself running around the yard pulling him behind me. He was laughing and after a few passes I was gasping for breath. My throat got that raggedy feeling that's reminiscent of running the 60 yard dash in gym class. Mama's out of shape.

This really was the most snow we've had in years and I'm glad Eli had some quality outside time, cabin fever in a not quite two year old is not attractive. This kid has a whine that makes me want to drive a screwdriver into my brain.

My basement plumbing has STILL not been fixed and I get more annoyed every day. I just want to do laundry without going to the laundromat. I despise the laundromat. When I was 20 and lived in the Northside I would put off doing laundry for as long as humanly possible; sometimes I'd buy new stuff to delay the trip longer. But eventually we'd have to go so at two or three a.m. we'd venture to the 24 hour laundromat in Oakland and use a whole row of washers. I always liked those trips once I was there, so warm and the big comfy couches and lots of magazines I'd never read before. The two tiny laundromats in Bloomfield offer none of those charms and there's the added joy of Eli who finds the washers and dryers fascinating but loves to touch everything. All of this rambling is basically to say that if my landlord does not get my plumbing fixed this weekend I'm going to murder him.

Pro & Con

Cons:

My dog has destroyed my carpet and now i get to try to fix it before my landlord freaks out

Said landlord can't get my basement to stop flooding every time I do laundry and refuses to hire a plumber

I will now be hiring a plumber with my tax money when it comes

I got my work computer fixed but now it won't load pictures, not even adorable pictures of Eli enjoying his sled

I've got the winter blahs



Cons:

We have a new president!

Eli is very very adorable

I found a dollar in the parking lot

Cheese Face

All the talk on the news on Thursday and Friday was about this big storm we were supposed to get. More snow accumulation that Pittsburgh has seen in years! Below you can see Eli in this big snow:
That's right not even enough to cover the grass. And this was taken on Saturday when it rained all day, cold wet annoying rain. Since we're experiencing some major winter blahs and cabin fever at my place I decided to take Eli out anyway; and just hover over him with an umbrella while he played.

As you can see he liked it. Yesterday morning we walked a few blocks down to get brunch and he insisted on only walking on the parts of the sidewalk where there was snow. He's much more of a fan of the winter weather than his mama.

See that ridiculous face? That's the face that Eli makes now when he sees the camera. I'm pretty fond of it and plan on taking a lot of snapshots so that when he's a sullen teenager I can remember what his smile looks like.

Charming

Last night I was late with dinner (my fritatta just wouldn't firm up) and when I finally put it on the tray he clapped and said "yea!" I laughed because it was adorable but part of me thinks he was being just a little bit sarcastic. If he was he probably got it from me and I'm very proud.


And just now I called home and Jason put him on the phone and we had our very first interactive phone conversation:
Me: Eli do you want to watch the dinosaur movie?
Eli: Yesh!
Me: Do you want daddy to put it on right now?
Eli: Yesh!


He's such a big boy. And now Jason has to watch The Land Before Time, again.

Snarky

I'm having one of those days where I'm just a crank for no reason. This is making me smile:

http://quotation-marks.blogspot.com/

Nothing like laughing at others to bring joy into your own life.

Dear 2008

Every year just goes faster and faster and before I know it it'll be 2025 and Eli will be 18, leaving for college and never calling unless he has dirty laundry or an empty wallet. If you type "Is time going faster" into google you get 819,000 results so it's reassuring that I'm not the only one feeling this way. But really 2008 I hardly knew ye.

This year I made significant progress on my cooking, I confidently call myself a good cook and will try almost any recipe. This year I hope to branch into bread making--without a bread machine. I also want to try to buy part of a cow and part of a pig from a local farm so that we can have organic meat all year round. If that actually happens surely you know and see pictures of all the lovely white wrapped meat.

This year Elijah got a lot bigger. He no longer looks a bit like a baby; my little guy is a real kid now. And while he was the most adorable baby ever he's possibly more adorable now that he has such a definitive personality. Unfortunately for my ability to discipline I even find him adorable when he's being naughty. I'll try to work on that in 2009 too.

I got a lot of reading done this year, and not just the Twilight series which took up a good bit of my life this fall. Book crack it is! Some very good non-Twilight books:

The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao by Junot Diaz

The Mysteries of Pittsburgh by Michael Chabon

The Things They Carried by Tim O' Brien

Lost and Found by Carolyn Parkhurst

The Book of Lost Things by John Connolly

I need to look at my shelves and the floor by my bed for more, 2008 was a good year for reading. Maybe this year I'll start using the virtual bookshelf and put it on here so that next year I won't draw a blank on what I did all year.

This year, for probably the first time in two years, I found new bands I like which excites me because I was starting to think I was my mom and would only listen to what I'd been listening to since I was 21 forever. That said I recommend City and Colour, She & Him, The Honorary Title, and Emiliana Torrini. on a side note Emiliana is a very fabulous variation on my name.

I did not get my house clean or organized this year and I really really really want to work on it. I need outside pressure. Perhaps a social worker visiting weekly and threatening to take Eli if I don't comply? Any ideas about cleaning would be much appreciated; even if they end up being ignored.

The biggest thing of the year is also the thing that doesn't feel a bit different. I guess getting married doesn't make much of an impact if you've already been living and parenting together. It does feel good that it's official just not a bit different...

I spent more blogging time on Christmas than all of 2008. I'm not sure what that says about the year.

Picture Pages, Picture Pages

I didn't take quite as many pictures as last year, getting Elijah to sit still for a good one is hard work! Still here's the holiday pictorial.
Eli putting out food for the reindeer, he won't remember doing it but this picture will stand as proof.

I ordered a lovely ornament on Etsy to commemorate the wedding.

See how cute! And the very next day I broke it. I've already ordered another one from the seller and I'm not even opening it when it gets here!

Jason and I have decided that Christmas Eve dinner will always be Chinese food. And the night before Thanksgiving is for pizza.

Jason was cleaning up the dining room and he called me out to show me that he'd wrapped the ribbon around the tree. He was very impressed with himself in an adorable manner.

Presents!! From far away you can't tell what an awful wrapper I am.

"What's this? New book...oh I like this book mama, let's read it every five minutes!"

Big truck from his Grand's in Florida, he's very enamored of it. Jason is not because it's incredibly noisy. And it has hydraulics. And lights up.

Do you know what's inside that package he's flourishing? It's a recorder (maybe you know it as a flute-o-phone) grandma Ros thinks she's soooo very funny. Thankfully he doesn't know how to blow it. But I do and I also know how to call grandma Ros on the phone and blow the damned thing into her ear.

Hot wheels!

My mom with the creepy doll she bought for Providence. It makes Chewbacca noises. And it scares me.

The hubby wearing clothes from me that actually fit him. I'm of the opinion that he looks rather handsome.

Eli & Dencey playing with the Mega-Block wagon from Aunt Amy and Uncle Josh, it may be his very favorite gift. Besides Where the Wild Things Are of course.

Watching Muppet's with Uncle Marty! He surprised me on Christmas Day which was a very lovely present.

A demonstration of just how hard it is to get him to hold still for a picture. Look at that awesome little flannel shirt that his Auntie Jen got him, who knew anyone could look that good in plaid?

With his football from Aunt Michelle.

When the box arrived two days after Christmas Eli knew just what to do. He's now a presents expert.

My new tattoo!! I love it and am already considering getting more.

The quote is the first stanza of an Emily Dickinson poem, the first line was the header of my old xanga blog that I had in Vegas. That blog was a good bit racier than this one as I was sans kiddo and kept all names but my own on the DL.

So Christmas is over till next year and all that's left is the dismantling of the tree. Which I will surely get around to. Eventually.

Hello Blog

Christmas was had and was very very fun. Pictures will be posted maybe tomorrow...

Also maybe a video of me reading Eli "Where the Wild Things Are" then I can just play it for him when I don't feel like actually reading it again.

Good Old Dorky Fun

It is very very cold right now. Like so cold that I've forsaken walking to and from work. But, not to worry, it's supposed to be 50 degrees on Christmas. I'm a little bummed out by this because we got Eli this sled http://www.onestepahead.com/catalog/product.jsp?productId=534254&parentCategoryId=100180&categoryId=100181&subCategoryId=100185 and I had visions of pulling him around the back yard Christmas day and taking adorable photos that we would enjoy for years to come! Surely we'll have snow at some point, maybe on his birthday which is coming up way to fast. It's hard to believe I'm six weeks awake from my baby boy being two.
He is looking a lot like a big kid nowadays. He may even get his first haircut before long. Don't hold me to it though, I'll probably chicken out before then!



On Saturday morning I had my annual gift exchange with Jen and Adrienne and I made out like a bandit, as the saying goes. Jen got me four additional pairs of ballet flats and I'm now trying to figure out how many pairs I actually have. I suspect there will be a head count and a photo shoot in the near future.



Thanks to the Twilight fever that has swept our lives there were very dorky gifts to make us laugh. I got them these buttons: http://ny-image0.etsy.com/il_fullxfull.46605648.jpg (I also ordered a different set for my friend Sarah) and Adrienne got Jen and I the ridiculously hilarious unauthorized Robert Pattinson Bio
I think it'd actually be impossible for us to get dorkier. Except that night at the Christmas party we had a Dirty Dancing Trivia Challenge throw down where I showed my ability to quote entire paragraphs of dialog and won this shirt:

I look forward to proudly wearing it for years to come!

Christmas is fast approaching and I'm getting very very excited. My shopping is finished (WOOT WOOT) and I have my holiday menu planned: Coca-Cola glazed ham, stuffing muffins (so good you could die), garlic mashed potatoes, corn souffle, roasted asparagus and cranberry sauce. Also thanks to a cookbook I received from a co-worker I'm going to start eggs and beets to pickling after work today; I have a deep and abiding love for all things pickled but especially eggs. Planning this holiday meal has me already thinking about Easter and toying with the idea of only making foods that have alcohol in the recipe. Googling will ensue shortly and we'll see how many recipes I can scrounge up.

I stole this from Postsecret because it's everything good about Christmas. May everyone be generous and cheerful and sweet to their family members.

And Merry Christmas if I don't blog again this week. Chances are I won't since tomorrow's my last day at work til the next Tuesday.

Wanted:

A professional wrapper. Apply within.

Blogger

Isn't making paragraph breaks. Everything ran together and I tried editing twice. So I'm sorry that the last post is jumbled.

Pictures, Followed By A Healthy Dose of Whinging

We were supposed to go Saturday morning to do Christmas pictures, but Friday night Eli had a fever followed by some nasty intestinal nonsense (these illnesses are the only time i hate cloth diapers). The photo appointment got cancelled for the second time and I still needed pictures for Christmas cards; last years cards got sent out without pictures and that WAS NOT HAPPENING THIS YEAR. So, Sunday afternoon we had a photo shoot. I bought at a backdrop and prop at the dollar store by my house. Then I tried to get Eli to hold still and let me take his photo. That was harder.

This face was solicited by Jason telling him to hold still. Adorable but sad.

This was my dollar store prop, a tissue paper tree from 1987! So awesome! And so completely destroyed now that Elijah got his hands on it. I may go over and see if there's another one and pack it away for safekeeping. It could be worth a lot of money some day...

I took over 135 photos, if you're interested you can see a bunch of them here: http://picasaweb.google.com/emilycleone/ChristmasPhotoShoot#. Monday morning I narrowed it down to three pictures and ordered cards from CVS.com. If you read this chances are good you're on my list and you'll be getting a card, I'm really pleased with how they turned out.

Now is the time for people who don't want to listen to me whine or just don't care about my issues to stop reading. Close the page. OK.

My period is almost two weeks late. And as of Sunday morning pregnancy tests are coming back negative. This is bullshit. I'm feeling a lot better about this than I was last week thanks to my baby board friends and Jason happily letting me freak out at home but it's still irking me. How am I supposed to try to conceive when my body can't get it together? Through the magic of the Internet I know tons of other women are going through the same thing I am and engaging in the same crazy behaviors. Said behaviors include: obsessively peeing on tiny sticks, pulling said tiny sticks out of the trash hours later to make sure they're still negative and becoming all to familiar with the phenomena of evaporation lines http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3093/2732979251_5a2b92d359.jpg?v=0. That's what happened to me on Friday, I was sure that the very very very faint line on my test was a positive. But no it's just a stupid test defect. The tests shouldn't do that, it's mean. It taunts ladies whose hormones are very clearly already out of whack and it makes me want to write pithy emails to people. When I think of the money I've spent on pregnancy tests I'm a lot ashamed. I'll actually save money by getting pregnant. Well kind of... Anyway I'll be happier and that should count for something.

Christmas!

I love Christmas. I think I told everyone this last year but as annoying people is my thing lately I will state it again. Yea Christmas! I love buying people just the right present and I love decorations and I love cookies and fruit cake (I ate an entire fruit cake when I was pregnant, like 10 lbs of candied cake) and Christmas music and TV specials. I love crowded stores and salvation army buckets and fake Santas. I am obnoxious in my love for this over commercialized holiday; just ask my not so festive husband. Though I think he's coming around a little, he said that the tree looked really nice. One of the things I'm most looking forward to as a parent is Eli getting older and getting mommy's holiday spirit. He "helped" me decorate the tree this year.

Eli was refusing to look at the camera during our little photo shoot. I hope that during our official photo shoot on Saturday morning (yes it was supposed to happen last Sunday but I'm a terribly horrible no good very bad planner--some people are like that, even in Australia) he gives good face.

The finished product! Blogger is still publishing my pictures out of order and I just don't care enough to fix it.

Putting the star on the tree as Audrey Hepburn looks on. I initially tried to get Eli to do this but young sir wasn't cooperating, like a lot of things he'll probably be more into this next year when he's almost three.

My favorite face.

T-Rex! Every time I go to Target I find something else fabulous. You may think that they're paying me to rave about them but I just do it out of love. Though I certainly wouldn't say no to them endorsing me in gift cards.

I have maybe half of my shopping done and hope to finish the rest of it next week, well before Christmas Eve! As for what I want it's out of my hands but I'll happily accept books, Starbucks gift cards, fancy tea or the fabulous coat from my previous post as a substitute.

And I'll happily listen to this song a gazillion more times before January 1st http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pA8UHeoYHQM don't pretend you don't like it! It's charming.

Not A Bummer Post

Since my last post was no fun for anyone I suggest you visit these links:
http://www.thingsbearslove.com/
http://mingle2.com/dating/unicorn
http://mingle2.com/blog/view/dating-tyrannosaurus

You can thank me for lifting your spirits by buying me this coat:
http://www.modcloth.com/store/ModCloth/Womens/Outerwear/Strawberry+Fields+Coat
I know it's expensive but maybe some sort of collection could be raised.

Trying Too Hard

For anyone who is not interested in listening to self indulgent whining my advice is to skip this post.

The handful of people who read this blog probably know that I've been actively trying to get pregnant with baby number two for almost a year now. And before that we were, I guess you could say, informally trying by rarely doing anything to prevent pregnancy. I got pregnant with Eli like that (picture me snapping my fingers) and honestly I thought this time would be a snap as well. It hasn't been. And I'm having trouble thinking of anything else. I am so obsessed with getting pregnant that I'm driving myself and a lot of other people crazy. Every month until my period comes I am analyzing every single thing my body does. Every ache, every twinge, every fluid, every weird dream, every episode of absent mindedness. Could that be a symptom? Could that be a symptom? Could that be a symptom? EVERYTHING until I want to bang my head against something hard to make my brain stop.

When I was a teenager and in therapy for a few different sorts of obsessive behavior my very awesome therapist taught me to meditate (I used to do this on top of the dorm sized fridge in my room which was a please eat bribe from my mom) and made me keep a negative thought journal. Whenever I thought something like "I'm so fat I don't know how anyone can stand looking at me." or "That apple slice had all my calories for the day now I can't eat anything else." or "My mom is ten minutes late coming home from work she must have died in a horrible car accident." I had to stop whatever I was doing and write it down. This helped because 1. I saw how ridiculous I was after a few weeks of rereading my daily entries and 2. I got tired of writing these things down. And while I'm usually obsessing over something in my head nothing has been as bad as things were in adolescence until now. Of course I have considered starting another fun notebook of all my nasty obsessive thoughts but I don't have time for that with a toddler and I'm not so sure it would even work. Until I get pregnant I can't imagine anything distracting me from trying to get pregnant.

Since no one in real life wants to hear about it I finally decided to blog about it because after rereading my old diaries I remembered how fucking good it feels to write things out. I also realized how annoying 14-16 year old Emily was (sorry mom) and I don't want to be obsessed and annoying like that here but I need an outlet. I promise to head up any posts like this with a warning and people can skip over them and look at pictures of the little man and continue to like me. Seems fair right?

New Look

I decided I didn't like my old template at all and I'm going to try this one out. Today it suits me. I have a lot to say but I'm not sure if I want to write it out here or how to phrase it if I should so I'll just put up some new pictures of Eli.
He really likes wearing grown ups shoes, here he's trying to put on the crocs that Grandma Nora sent daddy, he's having a hard time of it without using his hands.

That's better! He stomped around in them for about fifteen minutes and was perfectly contented. He likes to pay dress up.

Talking to my mom on the phone with his excellent after bath hair. When it's curled like that I can never fathom cutting it.

Cloth diaper butt! Baby's got back...

He wasn't mad here, I just caught him mid-holler. He's rocking out and my trashed living room is proof.

For Which I Am Truly Thankful

Thanksgiving went off pretty much without incident. There was only one minor disaster (it seemed less minor at the time) and it will never be repeated as Jason is now banned from using my kitchen. Everything I made was very tasty, especially the stuffing muffins which stole the show. I made them using this recipe http://www.cooks.com/rec/view/0,194,144164-243194,00.html but I modified it a bit leaving out the bacon and doubling the recipe so that I'd be assured to make the gluttonous amount that is expected of me. Also do you see how the recipe just says softened butter and doesn't specify the amount? Well I guessed high.

I didn't get to go Black Friday shopping, and I'm one of those yahoos who loves to do so, but I went out Saturday evening and got to raid my favorite place on earth, Target. Christmas ornaments were purchased and when the tree gets to my house I'll post pictures of it's silver and blue splendor. I also got Eli's outfit for his Christmas pictures (also to be taken at Target) and let me just say black velvet smoking jacket. Some one's going to look mighty handsome. After shopping we ate at Eat'n'Park and Eli had a very important Pittsburgh moment:
His first smiley cookie!

We only gave him a small piece, that's why he's looking longingly at the wrapped portion. I'm easing up a little but we still don't need toddler on a sugar high at our house.

Eli on Thanksgiving playing with his roasted asparagus. How could I not be truly thankful for the little man in my life?

So...

I really really suck. To distract you from that; look Eli!
Jason took this picture while I was at work. When I got home yesterday afternoon we had this conversation:
J: You should go look at the camera
Me: Why?
J: I took pictures of Eli you're not going to like two of them.
I took that to mean that they were going to be pictures of Eli smoking cigarettes, hanging out with strippers, drinking mountain dew, or wearing a disposable diaper. Thankfully Jason was just referring to Eli wearing daddy's Dolphin's hat. I mean it's gross but Eli makes it look good.

Big bear wrestling!! I brought my giant bears down from Eli's bedroom (they were presents from Jason when we were dating) the other day and he's decided they're excellent wrestling buddies. When he gets older maybe I'll get him one of these like his Uncle Marty had, http://www.tias.com/stores/gift/pictures/wwf1a.jpg, if he's lucky.

And I got new hair! I love it, it's the same color as Dencey's so that when I swap her for Eli it'll be easier to convince the cops that she really belongs me.

See how cute Dencey is? And she does not have the hissy fits that Eli's been having on a daily basis. Eli likes to abuse his adorable cousin by pushing her down. And then laughing. Mommy doesn't find it as funny as he does.

Of course then he does something like decide that he wants to wear socks on his hands for an hour and completely redeems himself! The kid infuriates and delights me.