Picture Pages, Picture Pages

I didn't take quite as many pictures as last year, getting Elijah to sit still for a good one is hard work! Still here's the holiday pictorial.
Eli putting out food for the reindeer, he won't remember doing it but this picture will stand as proof.

I ordered a lovely ornament on Etsy to commemorate the wedding.

See how cute! And the very next day I broke it. I've already ordered another one from the seller and I'm not even opening it when it gets here!

Jason and I have decided that Christmas Eve dinner will always be Chinese food. And the night before Thanksgiving is for pizza.

Jason was cleaning up the dining room and he called me out to show me that he'd wrapped the ribbon around the tree. He was very impressed with himself in an adorable manner.

Presents!! From far away you can't tell what an awful wrapper I am.

"What's this? New book...oh I like this book mama, let's read it every five minutes!"

Big truck from his Grand's in Florida, he's very enamored of it. Jason is not because it's incredibly noisy. And it has hydraulics. And lights up.

Do you know what's inside that package he's flourishing? It's a recorder (maybe you know it as a flute-o-phone) grandma Ros thinks she's soooo very funny. Thankfully he doesn't know how to blow it. But I do and I also know how to call grandma Ros on the phone and blow the damned thing into her ear.

Hot wheels!

My mom with the creepy doll she bought for Providence. It makes Chewbacca noises. And it scares me.

The hubby wearing clothes from me that actually fit him. I'm of the opinion that he looks rather handsome.

Eli & Dencey playing with the Mega-Block wagon from Aunt Amy and Uncle Josh, it may be his very favorite gift. Besides Where the Wild Things Are of course.

Watching Muppet's with Uncle Marty! He surprised me on Christmas Day which was a very lovely present.

A demonstration of just how hard it is to get him to hold still for a picture. Look at that awesome little flannel shirt that his Auntie Jen got him, who knew anyone could look that good in plaid?

With his football from Aunt Michelle.

When the box arrived two days after Christmas Eli knew just what to do. He's now a presents expert.

My new tattoo!! I love it and am already considering getting more.

The quote is the first stanza of an Emily Dickinson poem, the first line was the header of my old xanga blog that I had in Vegas. That blog was a good bit racier than this one as I was sans kiddo and kept all names but my own on the DL.

So Christmas is over till next year and all that's left is the dismantling of the tree. Which I will surely get around to. Eventually.

Hello Blog

Christmas was had and was very very fun. Pictures will be posted maybe tomorrow...

Also maybe a video of me reading Eli "Where the Wild Things Are" then I can just play it for him when I don't feel like actually reading it again.

Good Old Dorky Fun

It is very very cold right now. Like so cold that I've forsaken walking to and from work. But, not to worry, it's supposed to be 50 degrees on Christmas. I'm a little bummed out by this because we got Eli this sled http://www.onestepahead.com/catalog/product.jsp?productId=534254&parentCategoryId=100180&categoryId=100181&subCategoryId=100185 and I had visions of pulling him around the back yard Christmas day and taking adorable photos that we would enjoy for years to come! Surely we'll have snow at some point, maybe on his birthday which is coming up way to fast. It's hard to believe I'm six weeks awake from my baby boy being two.
He is looking a lot like a big kid nowadays. He may even get his first haircut before long. Don't hold me to it though, I'll probably chicken out before then!



On Saturday morning I had my annual gift exchange with Jen and Adrienne and I made out like a bandit, as the saying goes. Jen got me four additional pairs of ballet flats and I'm now trying to figure out how many pairs I actually have. I suspect there will be a head count and a photo shoot in the near future.



Thanks to the Twilight fever that has swept our lives there were very dorky gifts to make us laugh. I got them these buttons: http://ny-image0.etsy.com/il_fullxfull.46605648.jpg (I also ordered a different set for my friend Sarah) and Adrienne got Jen and I the ridiculously hilarious unauthorized Robert Pattinson Bio
I think it'd actually be impossible for us to get dorkier. Except that night at the Christmas party we had a Dirty Dancing Trivia Challenge throw down where I showed my ability to quote entire paragraphs of dialog and won this shirt:

I look forward to proudly wearing it for years to come!

Christmas is fast approaching and I'm getting very very excited. My shopping is finished (WOOT WOOT) and I have my holiday menu planned: Coca-Cola glazed ham, stuffing muffins (so good you could die), garlic mashed potatoes, corn souffle, roasted asparagus and cranberry sauce. Also thanks to a cookbook I received from a co-worker I'm going to start eggs and beets to pickling after work today; I have a deep and abiding love for all things pickled but especially eggs. Planning this holiday meal has me already thinking about Easter and toying with the idea of only making foods that have alcohol in the recipe. Googling will ensue shortly and we'll see how many recipes I can scrounge up.

I stole this from Postsecret because it's everything good about Christmas. May everyone be generous and cheerful and sweet to their family members.

And Merry Christmas if I don't blog again this week. Chances are I won't since tomorrow's my last day at work til the next Tuesday.

Wanted:

A professional wrapper. Apply within.

Blogger

Isn't making paragraph breaks. Everything ran together and I tried editing twice. So I'm sorry that the last post is jumbled.

Pictures, Followed By A Healthy Dose of Whinging

We were supposed to go Saturday morning to do Christmas pictures, but Friday night Eli had a fever followed by some nasty intestinal nonsense (these illnesses are the only time i hate cloth diapers). The photo appointment got cancelled for the second time and I still needed pictures for Christmas cards; last years cards got sent out without pictures and that WAS NOT HAPPENING THIS YEAR. So, Sunday afternoon we had a photo shoot. I bought at a backdrop and prop at the dollar store by my house. Then I tried to get Eli to hold still and let me take his photo. That was harder.

This face was solicited by Jason telling him to hold still. Adorable but sad.

This was my dollar store prop, a tissue paper tree from 1987! So awesome! And so completely destroyed now that Elijah got his hands on it. I may go over and see if there's another one and pack it away for safekeeping. It could be worth a lot of money some day...

I took over 135 photos, if you're interested you can see a bunch of them here: http://picasaweb.google.com/emilycleone/ChristmasPhotoShoot#. Monday morning I narrowed it down to three pictures and ordered cards from CVS.com. If you read this chances are good you're on my list and you'll be getting a card, I'm really pleased with how they turned out.

Now is the time for people who don't want to listen to me whine or just don't care about my issues to stop reading. Close the page. OK.

My period is almost two weeks late. And as of Sunday morning pregnancy tests are coming back negative. This is bullshit. I'm feeling a lot better about this than I was last week thanks to my baby board friends and Jason happily letting me freak out at home but it's still irking me. How am I supposed to try to conceive when my body can't get it together? Through the magic of the Internet I know tons of other women are going through the same thing I am and engaging in the same crazy behaviors. Said behaviors include: obsessively peeing on tiny sticks, pulling said tiny sticks out of the trash hours later to make sure they're still negative and becoming all to familiar with the phenomena of evaporation lines http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3093/2732979251_5a2b92d359.jpg?v=0. That's what happened to me on Friday, I was sure that the very very very faint line on my test was a positive. But no it's just a stupid test defect. The tests shouldn't do that, it's mean. It taunts ladies whose hormones are very clearly already out of whack and it makes me want to write pithy emails to people. When I think of the money I've spent on pregnancy tests I'm a lot ashamed. I'll actually save money by getting pregnant. Well kind of... Anyway I'll be happier and that should count for something.

Christmas!

I love Christmas. I think I told everyone this last year but as annoying people is my thing lately I will state it again. Yea Christmas! I love buying people just the right present and I love decorations and I love cookies and fruit cake (I ate an entire fruit cake when I was pregnant, like 10 lbs of candied cake) and Christmas music and TV specials. I love crowded stores and salvation army buckets and fake Santas. I am obnoxious in my love for this over commercialized holiday; just ask my not so festive husband. Though I think he's coming around a little, he said that the tree looked really nice. One of the things I'm most looking forward to as a parent is Eli getting older and getting mommy's holiday spirit. He "helped" me decorate the tree this year.

Eli was refusing to look at the camera during our little photo shoot. I hope that during our official photo shoot on Saturday morning (yes it was supposed to happen last Sunday but I'm a terribly horrible no good very bad planner--some people are like that, even in Australia) he gives good face.

The finished product! Blogger is still publishing my pictures out of order and I just don't care enough to fix it.

Putting the star on the tree as Audrey Hepburn looks on. I initially tried to get Eli to do this but young sir wasn't cooperating, like a lot of things he'll probably be more into this next year when he's almost three.

My favorite face.

T-Rex! Every time I go to Target I find something else fabulous. You may think that they're paying me to rave about them but I just do it out of love. Though I certainly wouldn't say no to them endorsing me in gift cards.

I have maybe half of my shopping done and hope to finish the rest of it next week, well before Christmas Eve! As for what I want it's out of my hands but I'll happily accept books, Starbucks gift cards, fancy tea or the fabulous coat from my previous post as a substitute.

And I'll happily listen to this song a gazillion more times before January 1st http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pA8UHeoYHQM don't pretend you don't like it! It's charming.

Not A Bummer Post

Since my last post was no fun for anyone I suggest you visit these links:
http://www.thingsbearslove.com/
http://mingle2.com/dating/unicorn
http://mingle2.com/blog/view/dating-tyrannosaurus

You can thank me for lifting your spirits by buying me this coat:
http://www.modcloth.com/store/ModCloth/Womens/Outerwear/Strawberry+Fields+Coat
I know it's expensive but maybe some sort of collection could be raised.

Trying Too Hard

For anyone who is not interested in listening to self indulgent whining my advice is to skip this post.

The handful of people who read this blog probably know that I've been actively trying to get pregnant with baby number two for almost a year now. And before that we were, I guess you could say, informally trying by rarely doing anything to prevent pregnancy. I got pregnant with Eli like that (picture me snapping my fingers) and honestly I thought this time would be a snap as well. It hasn't been. And I'm having trouble thinking of anything else. I am so obsessed with getting pregnant that I'm driving myself and a lot of other people crazy. Every month until my period comes I am analyzing every single thing my body does. Every ache, every twinge, every fluid, every weird dream, every episode of absent mindedness. Could that be a symptom? Could that be a symptom? Could that be a symptom? EVERYTHING until I want to bang my head against something hard to make my brain stop.

When I was a teenager and in therapy for a few different sorts of obsessive behavior my very awesome therapist taught me to meditate (I used to do this on top of the dorm sized fridge in my room which was a please eat bribe from my mom) and made me keep a negative thought journal. Whenever I thought something like "I'm so fat I don't know how anyone can stand looking at me." or "That apple slice had all my calories for the day now I can't eat anything else." or "My mom is ten minutes late coming home from work she must have died in a horrible car accident." I had to stop whatever I was doing and write it down. This helped because 1. I saw how ridiculous I was after a few weeks of rereading my daily entries and 2. I got tired of writing these things down. And while I'm usually obsessing over something in my head nothing has been as bad as things were in adolescence until now. Of course I have considered starting another fun notebook of all my nasty obsessive thoughts but I don't have time for that with a toddler and I'm not so sure it would even work. Until I get pregnant I can't imagine anything distracting me from trying to get pregnant.

Since no one in real life wants to hear about it I finally decided to blog about it because after rereading my old diaries I remembered how fucking good it feels to write things out. I also realized how annoying 14-16 year old Emily was (sorry mom) and I don't want to be obsessed and annoying like that here but I need an outlet. I promise to head up any posts like this with a warning and people can skip over them and look at pictures of the little man and continue to like me. Seems fair right?

New Look

I decided I didn't like my old template at all and I'm going to try this one out. Today it suits me. I have a lot to say but I'm not sure if I want to write it out here or how to phrase it if I should so I'll just put up some new pictures of Eli.
He really likes wearing grown ups shoes, here he's trying to put on the crocs that Grandma Nora sent daddy, he's having a hard time of it without using his hands.

That's better! He stomped around in them for about fifteen minutes and was perfectly contented. He likes to pay dress up.

Talking to my mom on the phone with his excellent after bath hair. When it's curled like that I can never fathom cutting it.

Cloth diaper butt! Baby's got back...

He wasn't mad here, I just caught him mid-holler. He's rocking out and my trashed living room is proof.

For Which I Am Truly Thankful

Thanksgiving went off pretty much without incident. There was only one minor disaster (it seemed less minor at the time) and it will never be repeated as Jason is now banned from using my kitchen. Everything I made was very tasty, especially the stuffing muffins which stole the show. I made them using this recipe http://www.cooks.com/rec/view/0,194,144164-243194,00.html but I modified it a bit leaving out the bacon and doubling the recipe so that I'd be assured to make the gluttonous amount that is expected of me. Also do you see how the recipe just says softened butter and doesn't specify the amount? Well I guessed high.

I didn't get to go Black Friday shopping, and I'm one of those yahoos who loves to do so, but I went out Saturday evening and got to raid my favorite place on earth, Target. Christmas ornaments were purchased and when the tree gets to my house I'll post pictures of it's silver and blue splendor. I also got Eli's outfit for his Christmas pictures (also to be taken at Target) and let me just say black velvet smoking jacket. Some one's going to look mighty handsome. After shopping we ate at Eat'n'Park and Eli had a very important Pittsburgh moment:
His first smiley cookie!

We only gave him a small piece, that's why he's looking longingly at the wrapped portion. I'm easing up a little but we still don't need toddler on a sugar high at our house.

Eli on Thanksgiving playing with his roasted asparagus. How could I not be truly thankful for the little man in my life?

So...

I really really suck. To distract you from that; look Eli!
Jason took this picture while I was at work. When I got home yesterday afternoon we had this conversation:
J: You should go look at the camera
Me: Why?
J: I took pictures of Eli you're not going to like two of them.
I took that to mean that they were going to be pictures of Eli smoking cigarettes, hanging out with strippers, drinking mountain dew, or wearing a disposable diaper. Thankfully Jason was just referring to Eli wearing daddy's Dolphin's hat. I mean it's gross but Eli makes it look good.

Big bear wrestling!! I brought my giant bears down from Eli's bedroom (they were presents from Jason when we were dating) the other day and he's decided they're excellent wrestling buddies. When he gets older maybe I'll get him one of these like his Uncle Marty had, http://www.tias.com/stores/gift/pictures/wwf1a.jpg, if he's lucky.

And I got new hair! I love it, it's the same color as Dencey's so that when I swap her for Eli it'll be easier to convince the cops that she really belongs me.

See how cute Dencey is? And she does not have the hissy fits that Eli's been having on a daily basis. Eli likes to abuse his adorable cousin by pushing her down. And then laughing. Mommy doesn't find it as funny as he does.

Of course then he does something like decide that he wants to wear socks on his hands for an hour and completely redeems himself! The kid infuriates and delights me.

General Malaise

I've been an exceptionally bad blogger. I'd like to make my apologies and excuses.
-I quit doing the casserole thing because it was a very calorie heavy venture, a lot of food was getting wasted, and I'm not the best with follow through.
-I've had an incredibly annoying cold for 12 days now. It fluctuates in severity but I haven't felt 100% for quite some time.
-I am broke and fretting over affording Christmas. I love to go over the top with presents and that's just not seeming like a possibility this year so I'm vexed.

See what a pout fest I am? It's best that I haven't been blogging. Here are two pics of Eli who's also been battling the never ending cold so please excuse the bleary eyed boy.
Eli decked out for a walk in the cold. He's wearing mommy's hat. It does look fabulous on him but I've since acquired to boy appropriate hats for him.

Eli loves football. The other day when Uncle Cory was visiting Eli fell asleep clutching his football. Not even two and already full of testosterone.

My picture taking has also been lacking. Eli was doing something incredibly cute the other day and I didn't have the energy to get the camera. Send vitamins.

Mr Yuck

They're doing construction at my office. The fumes are making me high and the drill noise is giving me a headache. I am annoyed. That is all.

A Brighter Future

Eli wants to know why I keep trying to get him to say Obama. And I tell him that hopefully Obama is going to be the president of our country for the next eight years. That if Obama's health care policy passes daddy can go to the doctor. Then I tell him about how countries around the world are cheering for the decision the people of his country made Nov 4th. Finally I tell him that the future looks brighter to me and that mommy is hoping that this means a better world for him to grow up in.

He still hasn't said Obama, but we've got lots of time.

KangaEli

Getting good pictures of Eli was not as easy as it was last year. I apologize, he never sits still now and my camera wasn't working well in the dark. Maybe I'll put the costume back on him and try again this weekend. Trying to get a picture of Seanie and Eli together before we headed out. Eli wasn't having any part of it when Seanie's toys were waiting to be thrown about.

Eli gets by with a little help from his friend.

I can haz candy?

KangaEli collapsed from all the excitement. Good thing the wagon has a belt!

He didn't even wake up when I transferred him back to the stroller.

He did however wake up at 3 am and get taken downstairs by daddy so mommy could sleep. And then daddy thought, "Hey why not give him a Halloween treat?". So he gave him mini oreos and a fun size Snickers bar. Do you want to take a guess at the next time Eli slept? I'll just tell you Eight pm Saturday. No more sugar for Eli.