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Friday, May 30, 2008

Do You Remember The Time

Dear Stephie,

You're not going to be here long enough for us to properly reminisce so I thought I'd cover a few of the basics on here. I'm going to do it in our traditional Michael Jacksonesqe format:

Do you remember the time I got homesick at the apartment and didn't know how to tell your dad to get to my house even though it was only like four blocks away. I'm happy to say my sense of direction has improved since then.

Do you remember how we used to play barbies for hours, and how complicated our plots were? Menendez barbie, drug rehab barbie, that game we always played where one of the girls started out living in the trailer? Possibly our barbies had more sex than any other barbies in the history of the world; what naughty little girls we were?

Do you remember being Missy Mondew? Sitting at the card table making crank calls with the rotary phone? We used to write numbers on the wood beam under the phone, so respectful of our environment.

Do you remember the night we invented our band Puberty Blues and you wrote our hit song This Is Me But Look At You? The greatness of that song lives on today at many an Australian high school prom.

Do you remember meeting Mike Hash on the hill behind Hills and smoking weed in the bushes? That was one horrible mustache that boy had.

Do you remember when I was so depressed and you were the only one who could make me laugh?

Do you remember the time I came to your house to beat you up and ended up spending the night instead? And we gave Jamie whiplash and then watched a crap ton of Bennie Hill.

Do you remember how I kept breaking Dave Nicely's car? He was super pissed. Ass.

Do you remember my backless patchwork shirt? I really miss that shirt, it was a good one.

Do you remember June and us running frantically across the boardwalk when we had quite enough time to walk?

Do you remember lounging on the trampoline in your backyard? And the time you tried to give me a strawberry flop and your feet landed in my crotch? Don't worry the trauma didn't affect my ability to bear children.

Do you remember when you moved to Vegas and we cried like little bitches? I'm still mad at your mom for making you leave.

Do you remember living in the suites? Our pink palace, "here's the living room/kitchen/dining room/den/reading room/bar". We had more fun in the place than any resident before or since.

Do you remember when Mike slept through your first date and I was all like "this guy sucks!"? You might have wanted to listen to me my beautiful, darling girl.

Do you remember our lists of why it was OK to wake each other up? Winnings over $500, Tom Hanks/Colin Farrell showing up to have sex with us, the desire to shop, fire that could not easily be put out with an extinguisher.

Do you remember our Wednesday night Sex and the City/food marathons?

This is the bare bones dear, and I've saved the most important one for last:

Do you remember the time we ate that honey baked ham?

Love you Gagar,

Your one & only band mate Leggle

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

The Cardiologist and the Future Neuro-Surgeon


Tuesday, May 27, 2008

A Long Long Weekend

Hello Internet! It's been a sad four days without you. I'm really considering ponying up that $80 for a new power cord, I hate not being able to check my email over the weekend, especially on a holiday weekend. I'm going to try to be sensible and check EBay and the Goodwill computer store before I go nuts though. Honestly I am so much better with money than I used to be, when I lived in Vegas I wouldn't even have blinked over $80. Of course when I lived in Vegas I could make $80 in two busy hours of cocktailing. Does anyone know a local Exotic Dancer locale that employs chubby girls with small milk filled breasts? Let me know!

On Friday Eli's Oscar the Grouch puppet came from Etsy, it's adorable!

I'm making a mean voice and telling Eli that I'm a grouch and hate everything.
Eli loves the puppetry. Providence is not so sure what to think so she just hid behind her cousin and continued to snack on toast.


Eli's favorite place to eat breakfast is sitting inside the drink tray on top of the ottoman. It's very cute, but a little dangerous, last weekend he was doing this and it was too close to the edge and flipped over. He was pretty mad at the time but seems to have gotten over it.

We went to my cousin Matt's wedding on in Meyersdale on Saturday. Matt is my twin cousin as all 12 of us were pretty much born in sets of two, Matt and I are only a month and a day apart so by my thinking he got married perfectly on time. It was Eli's first wedding and I had high hopes that he'd show off what an excellent parent I am by being charming, he was only half charming to say the most. I think the crux of the problem is that he didn't nap on the 2 hour car ride there rendering him a cranky mess. We had to hang outside during most of the ceremony, and for part of the reception which we left early. I didn't even get cake, sigh. And of course he slept for the entire ride home. The little booger. He did have a good time being chased by my little second cousins who were amazed by his never ending energy. I had the joy of being told by three people that Eli can face forward in his car seat-I know that technically he CAN, but he's still so small and it's so much safer to be rear facing-unsolicited parenting advice is my least favorite sort of unsolicited advice. I'm going to start telling people that in Sweden children are rear facing up to 55lbs, that should shut them up the Swedes do everything right just look at Ikea. I was also told that it's non sense to hold off giving a kid nuts until their second birthday, that I'm mean to not give him cookies and such, and my parenting was called "new fangled". Oh the joys of family.

One more note on the wedding that's not going to mean much if you don't know my extended family but the bride's side made my side of the family look classy.

Eli on the way to the wedding, not sleeping. (and facing the rear)
Eli being held by great grandma in my Uncle Larry's Delmont, everyone was getting antsy waiting for the bride and groom to exit the church.
Mommy and Eli dressed up in front of my Gram's house in lovely Grantsville.
Eli on the way home completely zonked.

Last night we went to my mom's for bbq.

Eli loves baked beans. After this he went straight into the bath.
Fuzzy black and white Eli, this pics out of order but still cute.
T-Bone is just so photogenic.
Eli snuggling on the couch with Adelaide yesterday morning, he loves that dog and will not leave her be. He's actually fallen asleep on her twice.
The much put upon Lady Adelaide of Bloomfield. Poor shell shocked doggie.

One last note: I am so excited to get my bonus so I can stock up my pantry and freezer like the Rapture is imminent!

Thursday, May 22, 2008

The Mad Genius

Last night Eli displayed not one, but two, new skills. The first being his ability to dance on command like Jennifer Beal doing Maniac in Flashdance, very frenetic and adorable. I'm going to try to get it on video. The second is that he now makes vroom vroom noises while playing with his cars! Who taught him that? Is it some manly instinct? Surely I've said this 100+ times but the kid is a genius!

Of course he's a genius who likes to have mean fit. I've kind of decided that the best course of action is distraction, I'm going to gather an arsenal of pleasing toys to distract him when he starts to go into tantrum mode. I still think it's too early for him to be doing this, an article I was reading today said that it commonly starts around 18 months. Which would make Eli a prodigy in all arenas of life.

In non-Eli news (occasionally I think of other things) I had a fantastic time watching the American Idol finale last night! Highlights included ZZ Top (you know Angela's dad on Bones) performing Sharp Dressed Man with David Cook, Graham Nash singing Teach Your Children Young with that whore Brooke White (the song still choked me up a little), and George-Freaking-Michael! And of course my boyfriend Jason Castro singing Hallelujah, how beautiful is this man!

Now that Idol is over, tear, Suz and I will be watching the British Office on dvd on Tuesdays. After that who knows. There will still be delicious food though, because that's what Tuesday's are all about.

Whip it! Whip it good!
I changed his diaper. And it was tragic.
Look at that stacking!! The talent awes me.
My sweet pudgy guy looking babyish for once.

Monday, May 19, 2008

Eli has been throwing hissy fits lately. A lot. Just complete losing your shit meltdowns. I'm not sure what the cause is, but I'm theorizing that it has to do with all the new things he's learning to do and not being able to do them perfect just when he wants to. He's making all sorts of new sounds that aren't quite words so maybe he's frustrated that we just aren't getting what he's telling us. Or maybe he's a sociopath and these are the first inklings of what's to come. The worst thing about these fits is that I have no idea how to deal with them. He won't be comforted, in fact it seems to increase his ire when i attempt to sooth him, and he's started to hit at me. Twice this weekend he knocked the glasses off my face while thrashing at me. My other option is to ignore it and then he hits at his toys or the floor or at the dog. And rarely do the tantrums end in under five minutes. The picture below shows Eli in mid tantrum while his cousin was in a charming mood.
See how he's hitting himself in the head? That drives me crazy! His brain is in there.

On a bright note I had a nice weekend, minus an episode of drunken belligerence after indulging in two Malibu pineapples (usually my limit is one), Eli got to hang out with Aunt Michelle and mommy got to go to her favorite sushi place for dinner. Sunday Eli napped, which is a weekend rarity. He fell asleep on the floor clutching his stuffed rottweiler from Auntie Rhonda. it was very adorable but the pictures on my phone, I'll have to email it myself. We had dinner at Grandma Ros' and young sir had his first taste of corn from the cob:

He was impressed. And he got to keep it until he bit the end of the cob off and choked a little.

Then on the way home I bought a DQ ice cream cake. Because my laptop still doesn't work and dammit if I can't use the internet at home at least I can indulge in a tasty treat.

Friday, May 16, 2008

Woe Is Me

For I am full of woes. Firstly the power cord on my ibook is broken and I can't afford $80 for a new one (isn't that insane? $80?) so I'm currently without a home computer--insert sad face here.

Secondly the weather has been so drizzly and gray, Eli and I are getting stir crazy and I can't get my flowers planted because it'd mean taking him out in the rain.

Thirdly I've just got the grumps. I need cheered up.

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Eli's Lucky He's So Cute


Because this not sleeping thing is getting old.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Son...

3 AM is not the proper time to drag both mommy and daddy from bed and eat cheerios in the living room. It is also impolite to cling to mommy's leg and scream like a banshee when mommy tries to leave the room; what has daddy ever done to you that was horrible?

Son, when you are fourteen I am going to get you out of bed and alternately scream in your ear/attempt to fall asleep on your face/giggle at the dog at 3 am. Let's just see how you like it.

Sunday, May 11, 2008

Mother's Day

Dear Eli,

Sometimes mommy is so busy trying to get through the day that she forgets to appreciate all the little moments that come in between dinner time and bath time and bed time. And sometimes mommy gets frustrated and is not as sweet as she should be. Sometimes mommy wants to get drunk and lock herself in the bathroom when you start having a hissy fit. But she always loves you. I wouldn't be a mom if you weren't around driving me crazy and melting my heart. Someday I'm going to miss those drooly open mouth kisses you're so generous with right now. Don't grow up too fast kid.

Love,

Mom

Friday, May 09, 2008

Root Root For The Home Team



Someone looks really good in black and gold. And is already adjusting his crotch like a professional athlete.

Wednesday, May 07, 2008

Working 9-5

Well in my case working 7:30-4:00. I am a mom and I work. Working mom, me. I have to work, there's no way around it, and I don't feel the need to make excuses for myself about it. Yes I miss out on things in Eli's life because I'm not with him 24/7. He did ween from breastfeeding sooner than he might have if I stayed home. Do I feel guilt about these things? Of course, I feel guilty about a million things in reference to him. I feel guilty about any pre-natal vitamins I forgot to take while I was pregnant, I feel guilty for laughing so hard that time he peed in his face, I feel guilty for getting so frustrated on nights when he cries through dinner and then poops in the bathtub. But on the other hand I'm helping to put a roof over his head, clothes on his adorable back and food in his rotund little belly.

I've been thinking about this more and more as we gear up for baby number two. Is it right for me to want another baby when I can't stay home all the time and mother the one that I already have? Shouldn't I curb my selfishness and wait until it's feasible for me to be a stay-at-home-mom? I don't know that there will ever be a time that I don't have to work and I know I want more than one kid. But is that fair to the kids? This is the battle going on in my head today after a stupid inconsequential remark on my message board made me a lot angrier than it should have. And there's always that nagging voice in my head that tells me I might be bored sick being a stay-at-home-mom, probably not, but maybe.

For me I guess it boils down to the necessity of the situation and my belief that I am a good mom. That Eli is well cared for and loved and that when I come home at the end of the day he's happy to see me and he knows who mommy is. I shouldn't let other people make me feel guilty, whether that was there intention or not. I'm rambling. If you made it through this diatribe thanks.

Tuesday, May 06, 2008

Church Bells

This is not going to be a cute wedding related post about church bells ringing merrily over someones future happiness. This post is about the lovely old Catholic church a few blocks from my house that rings their bells oh I'd say 30 times at six a.m. every day. It wakes me up, it wakes Eli up, it wakes up everyone but Jason who isn't important in this instance anyway since he'd go right back to sleep. I hate those bells. I want to get rid of those bells. But how does one go about removing a giant bell from a tower on a busy city street? I just keep thinking of that song from Hunchback of Notre Dame where they're saying "bells, bells, bells, bells of Notre Dame!" and they're so in love with their church bells. Did no one in that town have a baby and a bad habit of staying up late reading the Boleyn novels?

Monday, May 05, 2008

Playing Catch Up

Since the last time I blogged I took 133 pictures, I pared them down quite a bit to be fair to the few people who read this.
Young Sir often pulls himself up like this and look out the window. The other day I had it open just enough that he could get his arm out and he threw my old glasses outside. I tried not to let him see me laughing.
T-Bone! My mom's very handsome, very rambunctious dog.

Jason & Eli playing in the front yard at my mom's. There are two things of note in this picture: 1-Eli is in the grass! He seems to be overcoming his fear a little bit. 2. The heavenly light surrounding Jason; he's an angel on earth.
Daddy & Eli love this game. It makes mommy less nervous now that Eli's neck is sturdier.
Eli sees huge shrub; quakes with fear.
My mom bought Eli a bubble machine, it's pretty awesome though Eli's a bit hesitant about it.
Bubbles, bubbles bubbles!

Cheese! Goofy guy.
Giving mommy lots of love.
Eli thinks that Adelaide is a pillow. She doesn't mind 75% of the time, occasionally she needs some alone time on the dining room couch.
Plotting to steal my cell phone and bang it against the floor. Due to this frequent behavior I had to order a new cell phone today; it's pink.
Most attractive baby (OK, toddler ::sigh::) in the world.
Eli and Providence got to see Great Grandma Ruth yesterday. Eli didn't want his picture taken as you can see, grandma's smiling but she's got a good grip on him.
Josh and I with our kiddos. Don't mind my sleep deprived/dirty hair/agitated because my baby keeps trying to get loose look.
When we were out yesterday with Suzanne we saw a strange row of vending machines. The Nesqik machine which sells only flavored milk, sweet mystery of life at last I've found you!
A Pringles machine.
And this fantastically designed candy machine. It reminds me of those Let's All Go To The Movies animated foodstuffs.
I hope that these vending machines are the next wave of portable eating.